The IWTC Solves the Problem of Global Violence

Just in time for the Holidays*

Knowing that women throughout the world turn to IWTC for the answers to the world’s most pressing problems affecting women, we do a great deal of research. For years now, we’ve been researching global violence. Over margaritas last evening, we had a breakthrough and can now announce a comprehensive and effective solution to global violence.

Let us start with the premise that most terrorism, mass shootings, and violent crimes are perpetrated by men.  There have been no female Stalins, Hitlers, or Pol Pots to start wars and commit genocide. There have been no mass shooters or lone wolf bombers of the female persuasion. There is no ISIS, Al-Quaeda, or other terrorist groups organized by women with platoons of fanatical women soldiers. We asked ourselves, why don’t women race around killing large amounts of people and sowing destruction? The answer was clear – after a long day of work, managing a household, taking care of children, running errands, cooking meals, and cleaning up, we don’t have the energy to perpetrate such nonsense. And don’t let’s even discuss organizing and putting on holiday feasts and gifts since that really eliminates all spare time and energy. In short, we don’t have the time or energy to even come up with a plan to perpetrate epic violence, much less do it.

This leads us to the obvious solution where everyone wins. We need to enact and enforce laws that require: 1) all men get enough counseling to make them attractive marriage prospects; 2) after thorough vetting, require that they marry and have children; and 3) make men do half the work. Think of it! If men were not only working but also running errands, cooking meals, picking kids from school, helping with homework, sweeping the floors, selecting tasteful gifts for in-laws and so on, they wouldn’t have the time or energy to make the world a dangerous place. All of us would benefit from it and women would suddenly have a safer world to travel in and considerably more the time to do it. Everyone wins! Contact your governmental officials today and we will have Peace in our time!

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November
December

 

Photo Credit: NASA (The US National Aeronautics and Space Administration)

Photo: The Blue Marble” is a famous photograph of the Earth taken on December 7, 1972, by the crew of the Apollo 17 spacecraft en route to the Moon at a distance of about 29,000 kilometres (18,000 mi). It shows Africa, Antarctica, and the Arabian Peninsula.

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